Kyle Lafferty says he blames himself for the “massive” regrets he has about his career, which include feigning injury to avoid playing Northern Ireland matches when he was younger.
Lafferty scored 20 goals in 89 caps for Northern Ireland, his goals helping the country qualify for Euro 2016, but has not been selected since receiving a 10-game ban for a sectarian comment he made in September 2022.
The 37-year-old, who played for Kilmarnock at the time of the incident, was withdrawn from the Northern Ireland squad and subsequently banned for 10 matches by the Scottish Football Association.
Lafferty says that while he does not know if the incident was the reason for his continued absence from the Northern Ireland squad, he accepts he “took liberties” when he was receiving call-ups earlier on his career.
“[I] didn’t turn up at times when I should have,” Lafferty told BBC Sport NI in a wide-ranging interview.
“Not reaching a 100 caps, I blame myself for it, I should be well into a 100. I wouldn’t change my career for a second but there are disappointments.
Asked to expand on his regrets, Lafferty said: “Deciding to go on holiday instead of playing for your country at times. This was like when I was 21, 22, 23, just knowing that I’d done well previously that I’d get another call-up, taking liberties like I said.
“Maybe throwing in an injury where the rest of the team I was at might have been getting a few days off and taking the days off rather than going to play for your country.”
When asked to confirm he had feigned injury at times, he said: “I wasn’t injured, yeah, just stuff like that. Just daft stuff that you look back and think ‘it was just so stupid of me’.”
‘I’m not going to sit here and blame anyone else’
Lafferty, who now plays for Scottish sixth-tier side Johnstone Burgh, has tasted success during a nomadic career that has taken him to Switzerland, Italy, Turkey, Norway and Cyprus.
During the first of two spells at Rangers, the club he supported growing up, he won three Scottish Premiership titles, a Scottish Cup and two Scottish League Cups. He also helped Palermo and Kilmarnock earn promotion to the top tiers in Italy and Scotland.
Lafferty also enjoyed success on the international front during Euro 2016 qualifying, ending the campaign with seven goals as Northern Ireland qualified for their first major tournament in 30 years.
The Enniskillen-born striker accepts his international career is over, but while he recognises the sectarian remark was his mistake, he feels he the situation could have been handled better.
“I’m not going to sit here and blame anyone else, the words came out of my mouth.
“It could have been handled better slightly, maybe. I felt I was flung under the bus in a way.”
He added: “Never getting a call-up since, was it down to that video? I don’t know.”
Lafferty, who says representing Northern Ireland “meant everything to me” also regrets that he was not able to play a farewell game at Windsor Park.
“It is tough not being able to play my last game at Windsor in front of the fans, I had a great relationship with them.
“I like to think they always knew I was giving 110% but it is what it is. It’s football, you make mistakes and you have to live with them.”
Lafferty ‘in good place’ after gambling relapse
Lafferty, who believes he has been an “easy target” for abuse throughout his career, says he is in a “good place” now after revealing he recently suffered a relapse into his gambling addiction.
“I think I started when I was 12 and my last bet was six months ago. I was off it for three and a half years. Addiction is addiction.
“If you don’t follow your programs or control your addictions you fall back into and unfortunately I fell back into it. I went and got proper help from the right people and I’m now coming up to six months clean again.”
He added that trying to hide from addiction is the “worst thing you can do”.
“I’ve hid for many years with my addiction and the best thing I’ve done is speak about it.
“I’ve helped a lot of people, people have contacted me to ask for advice to get through their addiction.”
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