Editor’s note: This story mentions sexual assault.
The woman who started a local #MeToo movement in San Luis Obispo County when she accused Nate Abate of sexual assault testified in court Monday and Tuesday, recounting her experience and her decision to go public with her story.
Nate Abate, 36, was arrested on Jan. 19, 2023, and charged with multiple sex crimes involving three women. He faces four charges stemming from three incidents — oral copulation of a minor on Aug. 16, 2008; forcible rape and rape of an intoxicated person on Jan. 1, 2009; and forcible rape in June 1, 2012, according to court documents.
Abate pleaded not guilty to the crimes on Jan. 20, 2023.
Ashley Doe, who was the first woman to accuse Abate on social media and inspired a collection of other women to come forward, testified she was raped by Abate at the same time that her friend was raped by Julian Contreras, who was Abate’s close friend and the former owner of Kin Coffee in San Luis Obispo. Abate is the owner of Cardinal Barbershop in Atascadero.
Ashley is one of three women, identified in court only by their first names, whose accusations against Abate are being prosecuted in the case. Three additional alleged victims are expected to testify.
Since her post, at least 30 women have accused Contreras and Abate of sexual assault or harassment together or separately.
Contreras has since fled the country. Attorneys said in court Tuesday that he entered Mexico on Dec. 15, 2022. The San Luis Obispo County Sheriff’s Office confirmed there is a felony warrant out for Contreras’ arrest.
Woman says Atascadero business owner raped her
Ashley said she met Abate in the summer of 2012 while attending a jazz night at Creekside Brewing Co. in San Luis Obispo.
Abate asked her to dance, she said, and the two started seeing each other casually for about two and a half months. She was 21 at the time, and Abate was 24, she said.
When the two had sex for the first time, Ashley said she gave Abate a condom to wear, but that he took it off at some point without her knowledge, because she later saw it on the floor.
She was unsure if she saw it on the ground after or during the sex, she said, and when asked by the defense if she thought it was possible for it to fall off accidentally, she said no.
That encounter was consensual, she said, and though she was upset that he removed the condom, she continued to see him. Then at some point, she said Abate went “radio silent” and stopped texting her back. After about two weeks with no contact, she saw Abate again at Creekside and confronted him.
Abate told her he had been arrested but couldn’t give details about the case, she said. But he did say, “I didn’t kill anyone or anything like that.”
Ashley still wanted to see him, and she later learned the arrest was for penetrating a minor under 16 with a foreign object. When she asked Abate about the charge at the time, she said he called the victim “a lying little b-tch” who randomly accused him because he was at the same party.
Ashley believed him, she said.
The next time Ashley saw Abate was when Contreras ran into her and her friend, who was visiting to celebrate the friend’s 21st birthday, she said. Contreras bought the women drinks while out at Mother’s Tavern in San Luis Obispo.
The next day, Contreras was in his car when he saw the two walking. He honked, then texted Ashley inviting her and her friend to his house for a kickback.
This was on Aug. 22, 2012, she said. The friend had come to town for her birthday, which helped Ashley remember the date.
When she and her friend arrived at Contreras’ home, Abate was also there. The four passed around a whiskey bottle and Coca-Cola and played cards, Ashley said.
At one point, Ashley said she felt sick from the alcohol, and she went to the bathroom to throw up. She returned to the table and tried to play it cool, and then Contreras’ mother came home with a man and started doing cocaine in the kitchen, she testified.
Ashley said she asked the men for marijuana and that Contreras replied they could only smoke in his room.
So the four went to his room, Ashley said, and she took an unknown number of hits from a bong. She eventually saw Contreras on top of her friend, having sex with the woman, who wasn’t moving.
Her next memory was Abate kissing her and eventually pushing her onto the bed next to her friend. Abate started having sex with Ashley, she said, and she also became aware of Contreras’ hands touching her and began to wave her hands around.
That’s when Abate pressed his hand on her neck with a thumb on her chin and told her to “calm down,” Ashley testified.
At that point, Ashley said she just “resigned” and thought it would be better to wait until it was over. She wanted Abate to stop but didn’t think she could make him.
Afterward, Ashley said Abate yelled at the women to “get the f-ck out” because he had to work in the morning, so she and her friend ran out the door. She said Abate later texted her that she had left her ring at the house and dropped it off at her apartment, but she didn’t let him inside.
The assault left her feeling small, she said. She said she reported it to the police within 48 hours. But she said she told them she didn’t want to prosecute and just wanted to share information since Abate was under investigation on suspicion of a different sex crime.
According to both the defense and prosecution, however, no record of Ashley’s call in 2012 could be found.
Ashley also said she had contracted chlamydia from Abate, but that Planned Parenthood lost her records because they got a new filing system, so there is no documentation of the treatment.
Dozens of women accuse men of sexual assault after Ashley goes public
Living in San Luis Obispo in the years since the assault, Ashley said she struggled, despite having friends and a relatively good life She said it was hard for her to be happy, and she felt unsafe and “emotionally terrorized.”
Ashley said she ran into Contreras unintentionally about a dozen times since the assault, recalling that he would back her into corners. On at least one occasion, she yelled at him that he was a rapist. She said she had disclosed her assault to close friends.
By 2022, Ashley and her partner reached a point where they had a chance to move out of San Luis Obispo, so they did.
It was then that Ashley decided to post a four-part series of messages on Instagram to say goodbye to her past and try to find closure. She was seeking to be understood, she said.
Her first post in January 2022 was a general message about her leaving, she said. Then, she posted Part 2 on March 15, 2022, writing that Aug. 22, 2012, was “devastating” but did not explain why. She did not name Abate or Contreras until Part 3 on March 30, 2022, when she posted the details of the assault.
That’s when several other women saw her post and began sharing similar stories of being assaulted by Abate, Contreras or both men.
Ashley said that when a woman would reach out with their own story, she would say she was sorry and share a detective’s contact information. She said she never told anyone what to say to detectives.
Ashley provided her communications with alleged victims to both attorneys in the case, amounting to about 75 pages.
Defense attorney Scott Taylor asked Ashley whether she had spoken with other witnesses in the case, and Ashley said if she did, it was brief and she shared a detective’s contact information. She denied coordinating stories, telling others what to say or having her testimony about what happened to her be affected by others.
After Ashley finished her testimony, both attorneys read stipulations, or agreed facts, into the record. This included Contreras entering Mexico, no record of Ashley’s 2012 police report and that Abate was charged with felony penetration of a foreign object with a minor under 16 and felony sex with a minor under 16 in 2012, but that that charge was pleaded down to misdemeanor false imprisonment with one day in jail in 2013.
Testimony ended Tuesday with Lauren Doe, who said on the stand that she was raped by Abate during a party in Santa Margarita in 2009, when she was 14 or 15 years old. It’s the same party Tiffany Doe, who was also assaulted, testified about Friday.
Lauren’s mother took the stand Wednesday.
If you or someone you know are a survivor of sexual assault, you can call the National Sexual Assault Telephone Hotline at 800-656-4673. The hotline offers a range of free services including confidential support from a trained staff member, help finding a local health facility, legal and medical advice and referrals for long-term support. Survivor support and resources are also available through Lumina Alliance at luminaalliance.org or their Crisis and Information Line at 805-545-8888.